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My confessions, with love.

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IT REMINDED ME TWICE THAT I WAS ALIVE.

Drops of Jupiter- Train

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

Favorite Line:
She Acts like summer and walks like rain

Black Balloon- The Goo Goo Dolls

Favorite line/s: Comin' down the world turned over
And angels fall without you there
And I go on as you get colder
Or are you someone's prayer

Sway- Bic Runga

Favorite line/s: THE WHOLE SONG! This is my ULTIMATE, favorite song of all time :)

Cater 2 U- Destiny's Child

Favorite line/s: 'Cos you're beautiful, I love the way you are. Fulfill your every desire, your wish is my command, I want to cater to my man..."
"Baby you blow me away..."

This version is done by a very talented Filipino who calls himself "Passion". He's based in San Fo.
Go to Youtube to check out his other songs. He did a wonderful version of "True" by Ryan Cabrera as well as other mixes

Melt with You- Modern English

Favorite line/s: "I made a pilgrimage to save this human race..."
"I'll stop the world and melt with you. You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time. There's nothing you and I won't do..."

I'm Yours- Frank Hagen (Originally by Jason Mraz)

I saw this version in facebook which was uploaded by one of my friends (Hi Bebang!)
Definitely one of the sweetest songs I have ever heard. A very vital part of my 2008 summer song collection :)

Favorite line/s: "...I tried to be cool, but you're so hot that I melted."
"I won't hesitate no more, no more, it cannot wait, I'm yours."
"I won't hesitate no more, no more it cannot wait...I'm sure"

HELLO SUNSHINE.

T.R.I.N.A.

My friends call me Trina.
Some call me Trins.
I like pina colladas.
I love Tea/Coffee
Japanese food is heaven
I love taking pictures.
I love having mini-concerts all over my house which includes dancing in my bathroom, and singing in my shower.
That also means I love being a dork.
I love to read just because it's wonderful!
Powerbooks/Fullybooked/coffee bean is my safe place
My favorite place in my house is my bathroom
Two of my favorite words are STELLAR and SUBLIME (ergo stellarsublime_)
I'd skip a main course and go straight to dessert anytime.
I hate eating breakfast food if it is not served during breakfast time (Except when we eat in pancake house).
Jess has got my back.
I have the best friends in the world.
I can't ask for a better family (Crazy crazy!)
I absolutely adore the rain.
I think laughter is the best melody.
I still want to be a mermaid.
Give me the dance floor and I'll rock the night away.
Oh and music...practically my life.

This is what you call randomness.

Anything goes.

RESOLUTIONS FOR 2009:

*BE HAPPY!
*Never settle for less than perfect (sometimes)
*Never settle period.
*Do your best in everything
*Love yourself first. Seriously.
*Be of service for others.
*Dress up and look good for yourself :)

Some of my favorite Quotations:

"I’m erased. I’m gone. I’m nothing. And then the world is free to flow into me like water into an empty bowl…. And… I see. I hear. But not with eyes and ears. I’m not outside my world anymore, and I’m not really inside it either. The thing is, there’s no difference between me and the universe. The boundary is gone. I am it and it is me. I am a stone, a cactus thorn. I am rain. I like that most of all, being rain.” --Star Girl

"Perhaps we give the best of our hearts uncritically, to those who hardly think of us in return." --Lucas Scott, OTH

and my all time favorite: "Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain...fairy tales are more than true, not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten. " --G.K. Chesterton

In the NOW:

Date: 05/11/09 at 11:36PM

Currently munching on: Still nothing.
Craving for: Nothing.
Love drink of the moment: Cold unsweetened tea with 2 packets of Splenda
Currently watching: Bride Wars
Browsing through: Wicked by Greggory Mguire
Currently feeling: Sleeepppyyyy
In need of: a lot of prayers.
Current plans: Accept. Control. Love.
Ear Candy of the present: Patron (Tequila) by Paradiso Girls ft. lil John

Favorite Lines:
I'm feelin' so conceited (yeah! )
'Cuz everybody is giving me love (uh, uh)
I'm on Patron, Tequila (YUN LANG EH! haha)

Let's go!
Hey!
What's happenin'?
What you drinkin' tonight girl?
Drinkin' tonight with me!
Put your drinks up!

Hey girl
Where's your drink?
We goin' all get real drunk tonight
Hey girl
I got bud we can all get fucked up tonight (get fucked up tonight)
By the end of the night
Imma have you drunk and throwing up (hey! )
By the end of the night
Imma have you so fucked up! (have you so fucked up)

They said what you drinkin'? (what you drinkin'?)
Let me buy you a couple of rounds
And I said what you thinkin'? (yeah! )
I ain't the type of girl to get down
But I can party wit cha (uh huh)
And bring my girls aside (uh huh)
Tell the bartender bring the ice
And let 'em know I'm on Patron

I'm on Patron, Tequila
I'm drunk on Margarita [on Margaritas]
That Patron, Tequila [that Patron]
Me and my mamacita (yeah! ) [me and my mamacita]
Hey girl (hey girl)
Where's your drink?
We goin' all get real drunk tonight (get real drunk tonight) [real drunk tonight]
Hey girl
I got bud we can all get fucked up tonight (get fucked up tonight) [yeah]
By the end of the night
Imma have you drunk and throwing up (hey! ) [throwing up]
By the end of the night [oohh]
Imma have you so fucked up! (so fucked up! )

And now the parted heated
'Cuz I got a hot girl in the club
I'm feelin' so conceited (yeah! )
'Cuz everybody is giving me love (uh, uh)
But hold up, wait a minute (uh huh)
'Cuz my cup is going empty
I need someone to refill me
I'm trynna to get drunk (me too)

I'm on Patron, Tequila [yeah, yeah]
I'm drunk on Margarita
That Patron, Tequila [yeah, yeah]
Me and my mamacita
Hey girl (hey girl)
Where's your drink?
We goin' all get real drunk tonight (get real drunk tonight)
Hey girl
I got bud we can all get fucked up tonight (get fucked up tonight) [yeah]
By the end of the night
Imma have you drunk and throwing up (hey! ) [throwing up]
By the end of the night
Imma have you so fucked up! (so fucked up! )

Who wanna get fucked up? [I do, I do]
Who wanna get fucked up? [I do, I do]
Who wanna get drunk? (me) [me]
Who wanna get drunk? (I'm already drunk) [me]
Who wanna get fucked up? (haha) [I do, I do]
Who wanna get fucked up?(I ain't stopping them) [I do, I do]
Who wanna get drunk? [me]
Who wanna get drunk? (let's have another one)

I'm on Patron, Tequila
I'm drunk on Margarita
That Patron, Tequila [yeah, yeah]
Me and my mamacita (put your drinks up!)
Hey girl (hey girl)
Where's your drink?
We goin' all get real drunk tonight
Hey girl
I got bud we can all get fucked up tonight
By the end of the night
Imma have you drunk and throwing up
By the end of the night
Imma have you so fucked up! [Imma have you so fucked up!]

Put your drinks up!
Put your drinks up!
Put your drinks up!
Put your drinks up!

I'm on Patron, Tequila
I'm drunk on Margarita
That Patron, Tequila
Me and my mamacita

T A G B O A R D

Just Like Gradeschool. Leave a message.

I know it's a bit late...hahaaha

7:40 PM - Monday, January 14, 2008

I know it's kinda late...but hahahaha

happy new year!!!!! =)

Happy new year!!!!

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Justice is still the way to go.

7:37 PM

Ihave always wondered how people can be so cruel to others. How people can be so selfish to the point that they hardly think of anyone in return. Maybe that is one of the reasons I took up psychology...to be given even a hint of reason to why these things continue to happen.

I am a strong believer of both mercy and especially justice. I believe that no one should be put in a horrible position which they do not deserve at all.

I pray for Mang Jaime and for his family. People like him deserve something better. Bless his soul for being so forgiving. I am sure that if I were in his position, I would have unleashed the rath that all my friends know I have. I am quite surprised that I am not screaming at this very moment after reading this story. Maybe because I have come to realize that yes, it happens...yes people can be so utterly selfish, and yes...life can be unjust. It's a sad reality, and it saddens me more that I have come to slowly accept this. But maybe it's not too late to change. I dont' think I'm being unrealistic, because at one point in time...it has happened. Justice always prevailed. And someday...hopefully soon...justice shall prevail again.

Jess...ikaw na bahala kay Mang Jaime...him and all the other people who are treated unjustly in this world.

We all deserve a little respect...a little dignity...and of course a whole lot of justice for the things we deserve. Never forget that...never.

7 January 2008

Just 20 minutes ago, I struck a conversation with the taxi driver whose unit I had flagged down at Gateway in Cubao. I was wondering why he wasn't too familiar with the roads of Metro Manila, and he kindly explained that he had only been in Metro Manila for a few months. He was from Davao City, he said—and I immediately jumped at the chance to practice my very rusty Bisaya.

Maybe it was the familiar language that spurred Manong Jaime to tell me his story. Maybe it was the mother tongue that so reminded him of home that made him comfortable enough to narrate the events of two months ago that, as he put it, made his Christmas the saddest he had ever experienced.

I thought it was just homesickness. From what he had said before that, I had learned that he had no relatives, no family in Manila—he left wife and children back home in Davao. At 71 years old, he heard the stories from taxi drivers fresh from their stints in Manila, claiming that they earned far better than what they made as taxi drivers back in Davao City. So he decided to give up his stable—albeit not very high-paying—job as a taxi driver in Davao and go to Manila, earn more for his family.

At the end of his story, Manong Jaime tells me in a mix of Tagalog and Bisaya—almost flippantly—"sana hindi ako naniwala sa mga hambog na iyon." Why? Not just because the reality of being a taxi driver in Metro Manila was a far cry from the stories those men had regaled their neighbors with. Not just because he struggled to even just meet the "boundary" charged by the company for his aging unit. Let me tell you why.

Last November 15, 2007, at around three a.m., Manong Jaime was in the Roxas Blvd. area, looking for his next fare. He was at an intersection. The light turned green, and he was easing his taxi unit across the intersection when a very fast SUV crashed into the side of his taxi. He later learned from witnesses—and there were many, as there was a police outpost at the intersection— that the taxi spun and hit a pole. The police rushed to get him to the hospital, while a concerned bystander with a motorbike tried to chase after the speeding black Ford Expedition. It was to no avail, though—the SUV was going too fast for the motorbike to catch up with it, and no one was able to even get a glimpse of the plate number. It was, simply, a hit and run.

Manong Jaime, in the meantime, was confined in the hospital from November 15 to December 5, slipping in and out of consciousness. When he was discharged, he had to pay a bill that totaled roughly PhP30,000, including all his medicines. He was able to obtain some support from DSWD that covered more than half his bill, and his employer gave him Php3,000. The rest, he had to scrape together by borrowing from the other taxi drivers that he worked with. No family member, not even his wife, could visit him during his hospital stay. He says that the policemen who helped him were frustrated and apologetic, telling him that "Tay, kung nakuha lang naming yung plate number nung Expedition, kami mismo pupuntang LTO para hahanapin yung nakabangga sa iyo. Kami mismo yung haharap sa kanya."

Now, even though his left foot is still swollen, he forces himself to drive. "Para lang naa ko makaon ug makapalit ko ug tambal," he says. Just so that I can eat and buy the medicines I need. "Mingaw na ko," he tells me. He is sad. He misses his wife and children. He wishes he had never come to Metro Manila.

Why am I writing this? Why am I telling his story? To some, it may not be any more different from any other sob story of a probinsyano discovering the sad truth about life in Manila.

But if it was "just another sob story," why do I feel so angry? Why do I feel like I want to get out of the house right now and hunt down every black Expedition in Metro Manila, until I find whoever it was who caused the hit and run accident? Why do I feel so frustrated? Why do I feel like I need to be the agent of justice for this man whom I barely know?

I'll have to admit that one reason for my emotional reaction is a bit selfish—it has to do with what I do. Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I head to one of the top universities in the Philippines to teach philosophy. One of the things that I hope they learn from me is how every action we make has an effect on other people, whether we know it or not. The other thing I hope they learn is to respect and value every person, every unique individual alive. I worry a lot about whether or not they see the point.

After Manong Jaime's story, I half fear for my students. Would they have done the same, leaving whatever damage they inflicted in their wake? Or would they have done the right thing, would they have taken responsibility for whatever effects their actions had caused? Would they have helped Manong Jaime—or whoever other person was injured in the accident?

The other reason for my indignation is a bit harder to articulate. What repeats over and over in my head is: "I can't believe things like this still happen. I can't believe this injustice will just go silently away. I can't believe one person can treat another person, a fellow human being like that!" I silently curse the anonymous driver of the black Expedition.

I'm a bit embarrassed by my thoughts. Mang Jaime is far more charitable than I. He seems to have put himself in the shoes of the person driving the Expedition. "Siguro natatakot siyang mahuli ng pulis," he speculates. "O baka nakainom." There seems to be no hint of anger in Mang Jaime's voice, as far as I can tell.

I have to do something, I realize. But all I could do at that moment was give a little extra on top of what it read on the meter. Not much, really. I get off the cab, and start crying as soon as I shut the gate behind me. What must I do? What can I do?

8 January 2008

I still don't know the answer to my question, nor can I find any adequate way to conclude what I've written.

A few minutes after arriving home last night, I called my boyfriend and told him Mang Jaime's story. He, too, was indignant. He hit upon an idea, though. "If you really want to help, why don't you? Magkano ang isang tiket sa barko pauwi ng Davao? Baka pwede kang makatulong na bayaran yung utang niya o yung kailangan niyang bilhing gamot? Kaya nating makagawa ng paraan." And, I agree—there is a way that I can help, render charity by assisting him financially. After all, I jotted down his full name, took note of the plate number of his unit, the taxi company he works for—it would not be too hard to track him down. Maybe I *will* take the advice.

But that still leaves me dissatisfied. Somewhere, out there, on the streets of Metro Manila, someone did not take responsibility for his or her actions and *is not being held to account for it*. Someone did an injustice to another human being, and pretended it did not happen.

Maybe, you're thinking: So, you want justice, then? How's that going to happen? And In a sense, you have the right of it—our formal justice system operates at a snail's pace, overloaded by immense case loads. Being a vigilante is certainly not an option at all. How can justice be done? I don't know either.

But I'm hoping that, by writing this, I at least did *something*. Please pass this on—do something, too. Who knows—one day, this might show up in the inbox of an anonymous driver of a black Expedition that was speeding in the Roxas Ave. area, in the wee hours of 15 November 2007.

Let the music heal yoru soul.
Let the music take control.

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2007 ---> 2008

2:23 PM - Wednesday, January 2, 2008

AND THE AWARD GOES TO:

1) BUDDY OF THE YEAR?
- Franessa Blanco :) But of course

2) LIFETIME SERVICE AWARD (longest friend)?
- Danggay Santos and Alex Medina. Hahah I miss you again and forever OH and... B! How can I forget you :)

(OMG Sorry I just had to guys. Hahahaha)

3) NEWCOMER AWARD - COOLEST NEWEST FRIEND?
- Jean Chua :) Yiheee... and my 15 kids.

4) HIGHEST POINT OF THE YEAR?
- Having a39!

5) LOWEST POINT OF THE YEAR?
- Last term :(

6) BEST HOLIDAY?
- January 23. Let's make it a holiday k? (A 4 day one!) hahahah. Christmas as well.

7) YOUR SONG FOR 2007?
- Thanks for the memories -FOB

8) best movie FOR 2007?
- Enchanted and Transformers I guess :)

9) WHO DID YOU SPEND VALENTINES WITH
AND WHERE?
- Spend it with: HIM :) Where: @ Home...I cooked for him :D yay!

10) WHAT WERE YOU FOR HALLOWEEN?
-I was myself. hahahha @ the Manor in Baguio

11) RESTAURANT OF THE YEAR?
- French Corner hahah And BUBBA GUMP + MAX BRENERS

12) KISS OF THE YEAR?
- loads of kisses from family, friends and...

13) BEST DECISION MADE THIS YEAR?
- accepting a nomination (same) and my new year's resolution.

14) WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR NEXT YEAR?
- Puso para sa Bio Chem.

15) MOST STUPID IDEA WHEN DRUNK?
- Never been drunk eh.

16) TV SHOW OF THE YEAR?
- Gossip Girls haha

17) MOST LOYAL FRIEND(s)?
- Fran, Marice, Danggay, Mia (Sorry again, I was in TOSH when you were in Matteo)

18) HEARTBREAKER OF THE YEAR?
- None.

19) BIGGEST CHANGE OF THE YEAR?
- sobrang tanggap ng tanggap.

20) NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION?
- Last 2 terms Trina...you know what that means, and Wake up early and try to sleep early.

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Give me some good lovin'